Howdy! It’s Tues and I answer your questions, share comments and grant requests on Tuesdays now so here we go!
I compiled a few that fit together so you can have your answer or request granted sooner!
Questions and Comments:
I love this site!!! I’m all about moving on and the healing process after trauma. Unfortunately for many survivors it’s hard to find or gain access to facilities and treatment. Your advice is great it not only makes the journey something somebody wants to do, but it offers advice that most survivors cannot afford elsewhere.
I find you empowering! Can you share the five healing steps drawings? Thanks!
I cried as soon as your site popped up. I am a 43 year old male who just recently started to remember being molested as a child and fragments of the situation have been coming back to my awareness. I guess I had been repressing these memories for about 40 years and now that I know why I have had so much difficulty throughout my life, in so many areas, I feel a sense of hope for recovery. Thank you for being here for me and all those who have been abused. Too emotional to write more but feel positive about getting better and moving forward.
Can you share how to get the panic attacks and anxiety to go away? You’ve inspired me to take out my sword of trauma. I’m going to file charges against the man who molested me as a child. Love your website, love you, squish!
Just finished reading your book, Finding Angela Shelton. Loved it so much, came to check out your website. Thanks for giving a voice to victims of abuse.
I have the Oprah Winfrey Network and at least once a day I catch you saying to Oprah that you want to change people’s lives like she did. It plays in a montage clip. I just wanted to let you know that through your book and documentary you have definitely changed my life. You have helped me to find the courage to confront my abusers and live a life free of abuse. I know you probably get emails all the time but I felt compelled to write you today to say that you have made a difference in my life and seeing you everyday on OWN puts a big smile on my face.
First of all thank you for your kind words and congratulations on pressing charges! That is incredibly empowering and also a great healing technique.
I love hearing the range of questions each week. If I know the answer, I’ll share it. If I don’t, I’ll try to find an answer.
There are a series of videos about how to get out of panic and anxiety by using a simple tapping technique called TFT. It may seem simple but I’ve seen it work for many. There’s also a “Pretty Breathing” technique that works well too.
Once you go through the healing process successfully, you lay a path for others to do the same whether you want to or not. We are each living examples and everything you do affects everything else. If you heal, move on and lead a joyful life, you inspire others to do that same. It just works that way. You also break the cycle of trauma in your life – bonus!
I put the path I found that worked for many into a workbook -
Be Your Own Hero Workbook – it’s 118 pages.
If you’re going through pain, having this workbook to go through with your therapist, healer or support group is extremely valuable in helping you move to the next level of healing.
All the links to purchase it (and read it for free) are on this page including a coupon to get 40% off.
Here are the steps and the pictures per your request! If you want more posts on healing read the Survivor Manual.
1. Acknowledge the Sword
The first step in healing is to acknowledge that your life is not as joyful as you’d like it. It’s the moment you see how a painful event(s) is affecting your life, and not in a good way!
2. Remove the Sword
This is the hardest part. This is when you cry (sometimes for days), scream, beat the sofa and express rage, anger and hurt.
3. Heal the Wound
There are tons of healing techniques out there. I’ve complied many.
4. Use Your Sword
Once you’re free from the old story that is keeping you stunted – like a sword stuck through your body – you have the freedom to live a much more joyful life. You can use your sword as your pen, your camera, your canvas or whatever else you find that helps you express yourself in a positive way, not a vengeful one.
5. Practice Sword Play
Play? Isn’t this all meant to be such hard work? I don’t think so. That is why I love the sword analogy so much. Pulling a sword out does not last forever. I also wrote about how having healthy relationships can be play instead of work too!
All of the great illustrations and worksheets are in the Be Your Own Hero Workbook.
Moving on is fun. I’m having the time of my life writing a book series about magical hats. And yes, the little girl who becomes mute due to a painful event gets a hat at the end and sings an aria. Just a little sneak peek.
Please keep sending your questions in, I enjoy hearing from you. Ask me anything. Either fill out the little pop up at the bottom (it’s anonymous) or add a comment to my blog.
Here’s a question for you! -