Boy, do I understand. I smoked for years. I quit. I started again. I quit again. Then I finally quit for real.
What I realized was that smoking was directly related to anxiety and depression.
I never reached for a smoke when I was happy and giddy. There was always a trigger of either anxiety or depression, sometimes both. When I asked other smokers about that I heard that there was a connection but so what – they were still smoking.
For someone who is a real smoker, quitting for your health is one of those yeah right things.
Yeah right, I know it’s bad but then comes the click of the lighter.
For me quitting was totally connected with addressing the anxiety and depression first and then seeing how my smoking affected others.
When I simply noticed the actual smoke and smell drifting to the neighbors, going into the trees, wafting by a person passing, going up to a bird or over to my dog – that’s what made me quit. I quit for others, not myself.
So, if you’re still smoking, or know someone who is, please share this with them.
I have two questions:
How is YOUR smoking affecting OTHERS?
What’s your anxiety and depression trigger when you grab a smoke?
Yes, that’s me in that picture. That was my last modeling job! (and I was smoking too - ironic much?)
I am sharing a quest post today from Victory Lean, a writer at Dicigs.com – an Electronic Cigarette showcase.
A Few Simple Tools to Break Your Smoking Habit
By Victory Lean
Smoking is an easy habit to pick up. Once you begin, your body quickly adapts to the feelings associated with smoking and becomes addicted to nicotine, the chemical in cigarettes that makes it so hard for people to give it up. Smoking has other effects too. It reduces lung function, causing smokers to cough and become tired easily when doing physically demanding activities.
It can also have a dramatic effect on other aspects of your life, making you appear much older than you actually are by encouraging the development of bags under the eyes and wrinkles on the skin. It can also cause you to lose your hair, stain your teeth and fingers, and make you smell bad.
No matter how you look at it, giving up cigarettes can be one of the best decisions you make for your health.
Stop Smoking Aids
Many people, no matter how badly they want to give up smoking, won’t be able to do it without help. The addiction to nicotine is way too strong, and quitting cold turkey in the face of the urges and cravings presented by smoking can be very difficult, if not impossible. There are tools, however, that people can use to reduce or eliminate many of the cravings and urges associated with kicking the habit.
For instance, patches can help people who find that they cannot quit without help. Patches release nicotine into the blood stream directly through the skin, and can help a smoker go about his or her routine while still maintaining nicotine levels in a sufficient amount to reduce or stop cravings and cigarette withdrawal.
Electronic cigarettes are another tool smokers can use to help stop smoking for good. Electronic cigarettes allow a person to feel as if they are smoking by mimicking the look and feel of smoking a cigarette, without the byproducts of second-hand smoke, yellowed teeth, smelly clothes and hair. These devices can help alleviate weight gain as well, by letting smokers get a fix of nicotine which will curb the desire to eat and snack their way through the day as opposed to smoking.
These urges to eat are the main reason people gain weight when they stop smoking. They no longer get the nicotine their body uses to suppress the urge to eat, and your body will quickly replace the desire for cigarettes with a nearly overwhelming desire to consume food.
People can also make use of support groups and hotlines. These support systems have proven themselves invaluable to smokers, giving them someone to turn to whom they can rely on when their urges get to be too much to handle.
A New Hope
Making use of all the tools available to them is but one way for a person to gain a new hope for the future. By utilizing everything at their disposal, smokers have a greater chance of succeeding in their smoking cessation goals. Once they succeed, they will find a whole new world of possibilities open for them to enjoy their newfound freedom from cigarettes.
Victory Lean is a writer at Dicigs.com – an Electronic Cigarette showcase. She likes to share lifestyle tips and advices for healthy living.
Quit Smoking? – How did you do it? Still Smoking? – Think about quitting for others instead of yourself. Now, that’s a smoking thought!
Depressed much? Thinking life isn’t worth living? Can’t seem to get un-stuck out of that dark muck?
Here are 9 Ways to Drastically Dissolve the Depression and shed some Light on the Darkness.
Told to you from your drill sergeant!
Your Depression Drill Sergeant
Get ready. I am not gonna go easy on you. Not one bit.
It Gets Real NOW!
Sh*@’s gonna get real now.
Lemme tell you something, soldier (see how I’m not using the word survivor?). YOU are the one in control of your life. Not that prick who did you harm, not your crazy family, not your friends you don’t even like, and none of your teachers or co-workers are - YOU are.
Life is Beautiful, despite the jerks who try to dirty it. If you don’t believe me, watch that movie .
You know who continues your depression for you? - YOU DO!
Quit this humdrum depression routine you’ve set up for yourself because you are a fantastic warrior and worthy to this world. Step up and get your ass in gear. We need more people healing and moving on than sitting in depression and darkness.
1. Stop Your Miserable Routine
Going back to your house or dorm room or apartment and lamenting about your life is only keeping you right there in that same old spot – lamenting. Get your ass up!
See that depression and darkness like they are little dramatic dudes, like little trolls out to keep you stunted, in fear, anxiety, worry and doubt while they feed on your every dark and depression grief stricken thought.
You going to let those little dudes win? Hell no. Not on my watch.
Stop your routine right now – today – this very minute!
Stop repeating the cycle you’ve got yourself in.
You wake up, go to classes or to work, hang out with the SAME people you can’t stand every day, then go back to sit in your room, watch stupid TV and then go to sleep?
Here’s a different routine. Wake up. Get out of bed on the other side. Wear a bright color. Don’t drive to school or work the same way you do every single depressing day. Take a different route. Learn your city.
Don’t hang out with the same people. Start a conversation with someone new. Smile. For crying out loud. That’s right. Smile. You don’t want me telling you to smile? Oh yeah? Then do it anyway. You’ll push away those little drama dudes for a second or two.
Then don’t go back to your room at the end of the day. Go somewhere new. Go see a movie by yourself. Go to a cafe and hear some hipster reciting poetry that makes no sense. Write your own poem. Then take a different route home.
Break Your Routine. You set that routine up for yourself, you can break it.
In order to stop your routine of miserable – you literally have to stop the routine! –> That’s a Tweet-able – CLICK TO TWEET!
I’m proud of you for not popping pills like the majority of Hollywood who are medicated zombies. They sure make some worthless crap all doped up like that too. Don’t make worthless crap and don’t fall into the pill trap.
By popping pills for every up and down time you have in your life, you only create a whole other level of madness.
Deal with what’s causing the depression, don’t medicate it.
Yeah yeah. There are some people who really need meds but I’m the last person to tell you to take the pill before really doing the work to get your head on straight first.
You’re not asking me this question because you’re psychotic! You’re STUCK in depression. I’m telling you how to get yourself out of it like getting out of quicksand.
You want to be medicated and believe whatever some shrink freak is telling you to keep you on the couch for the next 25 years? Be my guest but I’m here to tell you that is bullshit and far too many people are falling into that trap.
Are you in that category? Didn’t think so. If you’re on meds and get all offended by this – Get over yourself. If you’re taking pills, they should be working, not making your more upset. Duh.
Stop your same old routine and quit medicating just to cover up pain.
3. Dance!
Didn’t think a Depression Drill Sergeant would tell you to dance, did you? Well, I just did!
Depression and all that darkness crap lives and breeds when you DO NOT MOVE. Like I said in Number One – YOU have to break your own routine.
Part of that routine is sitting. Isn’t it? Don’t you lie to me.
You sitting around looking at pictures, watching old videos? Sitting around reading forums with similar stories? What are you eating while you’re sitting? Yeah… GET UP!
Here’s a task:
Go to a Grocery Store and Dance Down an Aisle.
Do it. You know why? It will make you laugh.
There is always music in grocery stores. Most everyone is even not paying attention to you anyway. They are concerned with their own lives and half the time you talk to them, they are just waiting for you to stop talking so they can speak, instead of actually listening.
For you to dance a little jig as you’re looking over vegetables (get out of the frozen food section!), you will lift your spirits which in turn will lift someone else’s – maybe make them snap out of their same old boring routine – and make them dance too. Try it.
I said – TRY IT!
Afraid of looking stupid?
Check this out:
Yeah that’s right. Everyone looks nuts, go to Walmart. In fact, be happy I told you to dance in the grocery store and not in Walmart. Start dancing in Walmart, and you may start a cult. Don’t do that.
Go to a Grocery Store and Dance Down an Aisle!
Take pictures or video too. I want proof.
4. Watch Comedy
Just like moving your body helps with jiggling away those depression dudes, so does laughter.
Those little dudes DO NOT like laughter. They want you to sit, sulk, shut up and surrender to them. F THAT!
LAUGH. Watch comedy movies. Go see comedy acts.
Here, Try Giggle Therapy:
Do it RIGHT NOW!
Are you smiling? You better be. If you’re not, watch it again.
5. Get Connected With Spirit
Don’t believe in all that crap? Well, I don’t believe in your depression dudes either. I think they’re a copout. That’s right. I’m telling you, you have a bigger more divine reason for being here than to sit and sulk and whatever miserable thing happened.
Misery is all around. So is beauty, wonder and fun.
You see what you want to see. Ever think of something like let’s say a white truck. And you’re like they don’t make white trucks. Oh yeah? Suddenly, ALL you are going to see are white trucks everywhere!
Don’t think the Divine is everywhere? Yeah right. Look around. IT is everywhere.
You have a choice – stay in the same old routine and see it all as misery or look at life differently.
Change your routine.
That even applies to death.
Yes, death.
Lost a loved one on this physical plane? Talk to them. That’s right, talk to them.
(Try telling that to a shrink and you’ll get a bottle of pills thrown your way.)
Have friends who can see the other side? I do. I am sure grateful I don’t have that gift, but I have learned a great deal from them. One of the things I’ve learned is that you can talk to “them” just like you are talking to your friend.
There is no need to do any sort of ritual, talk to any priest perp or whakadoodle healer or whoever says they have a connection that you don’t. YOU can talk to them.
Talk to them as you change your routine! Now, there is a process of grief that can last for a good two years when you loose a loved one. That is normal. But if you’re sitting it in for ages and cannot snap out of it – it is YOU who is keeping YOU stuck.
Write a letter to your loved one who has passed. Read it out loud.
Don’t have a loved one on the other side? Talk to your spiritual guides, talk to Jesus, talk to Buddha. Have a conversation out loud.
6. Replace the Negative Speak
Tell yourself different things that the misery you’ve been repeating. You’re already telling yourself all kinds of crap in your head – might as well switch it up to some good crap.
Trying to cut out all that negative talk does not work as well as simply replacing it.
If you just try to stop the negative speak and dark depressing thoughts, it only pulls focus on them more. Those little dudes will be like, yeah look at me, right over here, pay attention. Instead of trying to quit them – replace them.
Replacing those depression dudes with some good ole fashioned angels – that’s powerful stuff.
If you’re one of those atheists who gets offended by churches and God speak, talk to yourself – you seem to know everything already anyway.
7. Go to a DOG PARK
That’s right. While we’re on the subject of GOD – there’s a lot of GOD in DOGS!
You want to to see joy? Watch puppies playing. You want to have a good laugh? Watch them getting in a good chase.
Wear panty liners if you’re prone to peeing on yourself while laughing, because those four legged creature sure are funny.
You don’t have to have a dog. Just go. They will make you laugh more than that stupid comedy made by pill poppers in Hollywood anyway.
8. Drop the Disappointments
People will disappoint you. I know, and it is depressing. Sometimes so depressing that it brings out those little depression drama dudes in droves! Some of your lame friends (we’ve all had them) can really inspire you to become a hermit and not talk to anyone.
People will ALWAYS disappoint. It is in their nature. They will always be stupid, rude, lame, dumb, mean and nasty. Just check out your Facebook feed to see that!
Right next to their lame ass posts, there is a little arrow. Hover over it and there is a drop-down menu with an option to HIDE. You can simply hide them from your feed.
Here’s a task: Instead of letting that lame-o make you roll up the covers and stay inside, GO OUT and do the opposite of them. Do something nice for someone. SMILE.
Pick up the litter.
I’m not saying be a martyr like poor ole you have to take on the world – I’m saying BE KIND.
Drop the disappointments. You DO NOT HAVE TO hang out with that person or group of people. Be kind and find some new friends!
The best way to find a new friend is to BE ONE. –> Oh, that’s a TWEETABLE too! CLICK TO TWEET THAT!
9. Start Checking Off Your Wish List
I know there are things you want to do in your life, I know you have that wish list. So quit your lollygagging and get on with it.
I know you want to try that class. I know you want to learn how to box and how about that trip to Ireland you always wanted to do?
If you added up all the time you spent placating those little depressing dudes, you could have traveled the world already and become fluent in French.
So, as you change your routine, use that new energy to accelerate your wish list planning.
Got Excuses?
I don’t want to hear them. You know why? Because I don’t buy it. You know who is keeping you back? YOU!
You know who can kick those little depression dudes right out of your house and paint the walls a new color while you’re at it? YOU CAN.
So do it.
Offended? Good. Use it.
It’s been a pleasure being your Depression Drill Sergeant - but I can’t do the work for you, soldier, you have to.
If fact – list out your excuses below. Just rattle ‘em off. I don’t have time, I don’t have money, I don’t… blah blah blah. THEN next to it – write the exact opposite. I’m changing my routine, I’m laughing. I’m going to the dog park…
Before we were married, we were pregnant with twins (they run in my family) and we were beside ourselves with excitement and that holycrapollee feeling. But the little ones did not make it. No heartbeat. Nothing. I had to have a DNC. It totally sucked. But I know it happens and who knows what caused it. Miscarriages can be a mystery.
Best Wedding Ever
But we got through it and decided to wait a while, get married and have the best wedding ever (which we totally did!).
We had a super fun Country Wedding complete with dress up and our wedding invite that looked like an Old Farmer’s Almanac and was over 150 pages! It was so awesome and the hit of all the mailboxes.
Then we went on our super fun foodie honeymoon where we drove 4000 miles with no destination – only out for good food and cute places to stay. The only rule was NO interstates. So we stayed on State and country roads and met so many great people and got to love the country even more.
Then my mom feel and broke her knee. We flew her to my surgeon who mended me when I broke my leg and turned back towards home while my in laws and friends in town looked after mom. When we got back she was in our bed and I said to my husband, “Honeymoon is over, your mother in law is in your bed.”
She lived with us while she recouped.
Not easy to procreate. Although she would beg to differ.
Making Babies
After mom went back home all mended, we went back to trying for babies.
Every single month I felt pregnant. And I mean I had ALL the symptoms. But each month Aunt Rose would show up. I even started a separate blog where I could bitch about going through the whole process called WriteMommy.com.
Then (as can read all about on my snarky not-a-mom-blog) the doctor found a polyp. According to her, it most likely caused the miscarriage and may have been preventing others from “sticking”.
That irritated me to no end and of course I blogged about it. I started Write Mommy so that one could be ALL about writing books while making babies – or trying to make babies.
We’ve heard all kinds of things too. Everyone and their mother have advice on what to do or not to do. At one point we got so frustrated and were like why don’t we just “do it” and trust that everything happens for a reason.
What About Kids?
So to answer your question – with a long story – we do want kids. But if they don’t turn out to be human kids – we are fine.
As my husband told me: we have the best life together and we will have fun and be happy no matter what happens.
Dammit, I love him!
Of course, we are slowly starting a little gentleman’s farm (according to me and my mother-in-law!) and I did say if babies didn’t work out, we could adopt three little kids – and when I say little – I mean pygmy!
Three Little Kids
Name Our Kids!
As I stated on my not-a-mommy-blog post about this – please name our kids.
Go ahead. It makes me happy. What would you name our three little kids?
Submit a Question or Comment anonymously in that pop up in the bottom right corner of my site OR visit my Contact Page by clicking that silly picture of me above!
Boy, do I understand. I smoked for years. I quit. I started again. I quit again. Then I finally quit for real.
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