Is Mackenzie Phillips a Liar or Are You Dumb?

I wrote about Mackenzie Phillips already – http://angelashelton.com/high-arrival-mackenzie-phillips and then I met her.  She is funny, smart, caring, sensitive and and very cool.  I look forward to being friends with her.  I love it when survivors come forward, speak out and against all odds thrive.  She is and angel in the Army of Angels.

I was having a meeting with my producer last night about the movie we’re working on, Hawk Dances.  During the meeting I was alerted about a comment on my FB page from Bud about Mackenzie being a liar. I no longer jump to attention when drama happens online. I roll my eyes and don’t let it disrupt my meeting, especially a meeting about the music for Hawk Dances.   Apparently Bud didn’t read my first post about Mackenzie.  This morning I got up and went to see what kind of boloni was posted.  Here is a snapshot of it.

Picture 12 Is Mackenzie Phillips a Liar or Are You Dumb?

Dear Bud,

Having become an expert in trauma and recovery I feel compeled to bitch slap you upside your head.  But instead let me explain a few things to you.  First of all most survivors cannot speak about their abuse at all until their perp (perpetrator, rapist, abuser, psycho) is deceased.  There is a lot of fear and numbness that surrounds the victim due to the manipulation of perpetrators.  They have a very distinct and heavy hold on their prey. Plus, when the perp is an upstanding person in society whether a celebrity in Mackenzie’s case or a politician, police chief, judge, doctor, lawyer, physicist or psychiatrist, the victim is kept even  more silent due to the fear of ruining the career of the perp and thus hurting the entire family.  Children protect their abusers.  Children want to believe they are loved so badly that they will protect their abuser because over 90% of the time, the perp is someone they know, love and trust.  In far too many cases, victims stay silent because they love their abuser. I know I love my dad and protected him greatly, even lying on the stand in order to protect him.  The dynamics between the perp and the prey are vast and complicated.  It is also set up by perps to make the victims look crazy.  Plus, victims are usually the ones who become drug addicts, self mutilators, “crazy”, and self destructive while the perps thrive and in many cases get rich on the child pornography they created of the victim.  Even you yourself said that she was a “drug fueld, delusional, selfish, needy, fried fraud.”   And I say you are buying into the groundwork laid out by perps and their networks.   There is also a tactic used by them of putting the children when they are 10-14 into mental institutions and getting them on meds so that when they do come forward to break the silence later in life, the family produces the medical file and says, “She’s always been crazy” or “he’s always been a bit off.”   It is one of the many perp tactics and you just fell for one.  “If anything went on, it was daddy who was raped” is what you say? No wonder juries give child rapists no time at all and so many victims go crazy with people like you having those kinds of uneducated opinions.

Another one of the tactics or MOs of perps is to abuse only one of the children in the family so that when that one child does come forward they are seen as a liar by the whole family.   There are times when they select more than one child but threaten death to each privately so that both children are silent.  Not until many years into their adult life (if they finally talk about it each other) do they find out that both of them were being abused.

highonarrival Is Mackenzie Phillips a Liar or Are You Dumb?

To say that Mackenzie is just out to make money is ludicrous.  First of all, I hope she makes millions on her book.  Money will never take away the pain of being raped by your father.  Second of all, no amount of money is worth the pain of losing your whole family because you are trying to heal and help others.  Plus, like me, Mackenzie really loved her dad and wanted to protect him.  Now that he’s dead, it is time to come forward.  Child rape is an epidemic and the silence is deafening.  By her breaking the silence, she is going to get ridiculed.  It comes with the territory.   I have been accused by perps and enablers for making money on my story too and I laugh a big belly laugh at that one.  What I do is service work to help others heal.  I saw that drive in Mackenzie too when I looked into her eyes.  She, like me, came forward with her story and caught hell for it but the majority of the responses are thank you, thank you, thank you for speaking out for those who cannot speak.  Now, she is driven to help others by speaking out and she’s doing just that and I’m going to help her speak even louder, especially when I read posts like the one you made.

So in your ignorance, and I respectfully say that you are dumb when it comes to the facts about child sexual abuse and rape, you have posted bullcrap on my personal FB profile and I take offense to it.  But it starts a dialog and I thank you for that.  Mackenzie talked to me at lunch about how she is so saddened by her family coming out in public to defame her because not only does it hurt, but it discourages other victims from coming forward.  And I said, oh no, my friend, it lets those who have come forward and lost everything because of it know that they’re not crazy.   You’re just seeing the stories in the media. There are thousands and I mean thousands, millions actually, of other stories from people who have been victimized as children.  May they see what happens when survivors come forward and may it give them the information to be fully prepared for the fallout and may they all take that leap in order to protect more children.  You haven’t seen anything yet, just wait until more come forward. Wait until the perp networks start to get exposed.  Then you’re really going to be posting on my wall but it’s going to be an entirely different “OMG, I can’t believe it.”

You say that you only bring it up because you think that Mackenzie’s actions “demean and trivialize the real issues of incest and abuse within families and does a tremendous disservice to the healing process of those with a real story.”  I say you have no idea what you’re talking about.  She is doing a huge service to survivors by coming forward and taking the hit.  If you think she’s lying try hearing the stories of the children who are kept bound and gagged in the basement while the local police, judge, dentist, pediatrician and priest come over and rape and torture them for fun – together!  But that’s too wild a story, you just can’t believe that one. That’s just too far fetched like a celebrity raping kids, I mean, that’s just crazy.   Bud, it is crazy.  You even said “this is believable, but seems preposterous.”  Raping a child sounds preposterous but it happens every day. It’s happening right now at this very moment while you’re reading this.  A child is being raped right now.  Do you believe them?  What if I tell you the perp is a friend of yours, that guy who you think is so awesome?   Go ahead and call that child a liar but don’t say it to my face because you might get smacked.  I’ll protect that child because I know the truth.


I suggest you take the Stewards of Children training from Darkness to Light so you can see how to recognize child sexual abuse.

pixel Is Mackenzie Phillips a Liar or Are You Dumb?

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I love it when you comment. It makes me happy happy happy.

  • ladyjtalks

    boy, the most I've seen this comment box jump. Good things from bad, and yes, bitch slap that bad boy once for me also. Thank you for coming to Mackenzie's defense. It hurts still when I hear that “why did you wait till he was dead” or simply why didn't you speak up when in happened. I can't believe with all that we all talk about that someone would drop this on your page if not for the fact that they are looking to get some attention themselves. Yet like you said it did stir the talk and that's a good thing. thank

  • Tracy064

    Very well written article and thank you for hopefully setting this man straight. Society tends to look down on the child for some reason, something I will never understand. Also our justice system stinks. I know men who have only gotten probation for their disgusting crime. America needs to embrace the victims and stand up and say, NO MORE!!

  • ladyjtalks

    boy, the most I've seen this comment box jump. Good things from bad, and yes, bitch slap that bad boy once for me also. Thank you for coming to Mackenzie's defense. It hurts still when I hear that “why did you wait till he was dead” or simply why didn't you speak up when in happened. I can't believe with all that we all talk about that someone would drop this on your page if not for the fact that they are looking to get some attention themselves. Yet like you said it did stir the talk and that's a good thing. thank

  • Tracy064

    Very well written article and thank you for hopefully setting this man straight. Society tends to look down on the child for some reason, something I will never understand. Also our justice system stinks. I know men who have only gotten probation for their disgusting crime. America needs to embrace the victims and stand up and say, NO MORE!!

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  • http://angelashelton.com/ Angela Shelton

    Thanks Tracie. But again, the bitch slapping is a figure of speech for hitting someone upside the head with reality. Some people took that literally. Someone actually sided with Bud too, saying poor Bud got attacked while ignoring all of the mean and misinformed things he spewed. Interesting. Reminds me of all the people who ignore the victim and protect the perp. Amazing really.

  • Tracie

    I have never enjoyed a conversation about bitch slapping someone so much before this moment!! :)

    I want one of those shirts Angela! Genius!

  • http://angelashelton.com/ Angela Shelton

    Thank you. I think I responded in a calm educational manner. Although some take the “bitch slapping” literal and it is a figure of speech. I am not into violence. But there are times when you need to be hit upside the head (figuratively).

  • Indianashame Teardropsforkatelynn

    Good For You Angela:-) We know what we know and all the abusers in the world and their enablers will not deny the truth any longer! This silence and disbelief is the abusers best friend:-( !!!!!! Tell Mackenzie thank you for her courage many survivors knew how these abusers and their enablers would go after her. Until you walk a day in Mackenizes shoes no one has the right to tell her how she should have reacted to the horror. Because trust me there is no playbook to how to react to a child being victomized unto adulthood . The only thing she needs is not let the hitters win and if she can do that Mackenzie has succeed:-) You tell her we already believed because these so called family members reactions are all to famaliar!!!!!!
    INDIANAN’S SHAME TEARDROPS FOR KATELYNN
    “We will not remember long the voices of our enemies,
    But we SHAll never forget the silence of our friends!”
    Excerpt from Martin Muther King Jr sermon

    Petition for Justice for Katelynn:
    http://www.gopetition.com/online/5918.html

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  • Julie Reed Brown

    Excellent and very well written in rsponse to Bud.

  • http://angelashelton.com/ Angela Shelton

    Thanks Lana!

  • http://angelashelton.com/ Angela Shelton

    hehehee, can’t wait to get them myself.

  • http://angelashelton.com/ Angela Shelton

    Bitch slapping is more of a metaphor Mr. Prince than something I’d physically do. And I think poor Bud just experienced it.

  • http://angelashelton.com/ Angela Shelton

    Thanks Carolyn.

  • Kara J.

    Reactions like Bud’s are sad, but they are, unfortunately, very common. I heard similar reactions around the water cooler at work after Mackenzie’s interview on Oprah.

    I picked up her book hours before her Oprah interview aired on my local station. I knew nothing about the book, and I knew very little about her. When I was a teenager, my friends and I would get screwed up while watching her Disney show at 3:00 a.m., and I was certain that I’d seen her in interviews where she was warning teenagers not to spend their formative years dropping whatever drugs they could get their hands on. Obviously, I hadn’t paid much attention to the latter.

    I bought the book because I was depressed and needed something fluffy to get me through the rest of my day. But the book wasn’t fluffy. I spent the rest of the night reading that book and living through my own experiences – from acne, to abuse, and then to drug abuse.

    The experiences that she and I had were a little different – I never had success to lose – but I got where she was coming from. I knew what it was like to be abused by a father in my adulthood. I knew what it was like to want to feel loved. I knew what it was like to have your family members doubt you. I knew what it was like to take something to make you feel better only to have it get the better of you.

    And I still know what it’s like to want to protect the people who should have spent their lives protecting me.

    I sent her a note on Facebook, which is something I’ve never done before. I wanted this woman to know that someone understood where she was coming from, and that it does help people to see that someone else has gone through similar circumstances. I hope that my silly little note let her know that there are a few people in this world who are pulling for her. She deserves to know that.

    As an aside, I want to let people know that her book is not an incest memoir. The book is 292 pages, and roughly 5 pages of it deal with incest. And while I’m sure that those 5 pages worth of information colored much of Mackenzie’s life, there’s a lot more to her 49 years than that.

    I don’t care if she’s making money off of it; in fact, more power to her if she is. I’ve made money writing about my own crappy past, and I’ll be damned if I let anyone let me feel guilty about that. I hide behind pseudonyms and “fiction”, but she had the chutzpah to stick her name on it. I’m not going to give her anything less than my admiration for it.

  • Carolyn

    I know Mackenzie, well as I call her Laura, personally. It came as a shock as to what happend. The first thing I thought was that I felt so bad and poor Shane. Shane and I were very good friends and Laura was a good mother to him. Never once did she brag about who she was or made herself out to be better. She was a normal person. She treated all us kids as if we were her own. I respected her like a mother. It wasn’t until my own mother told me that she was an actress. She gave Shane a normal life and she acted like a human being. I never thought of her to be on drugs and if she was she hid it well. I appreciate her in many ways. It angers me to see the horrible nonsense being said. It really angered me that some jerk had the nerve to say her son better watch out implying she would sleep with him. I didn’t know her father, she didn’t speak of him. One time I heard about him and it was from Shane saying he wanted to go swimming at his house because they had a heated pool. I know that being Bipolar you hold a lot of hurt in. You don’t want to talk because you feel alone, scared, and like no one understands. I give her a lot of admiration to come out and tell her story. Yes, her father can’t defend himself, yes she can’t take back that it is out and what she has said. I do however hope, it gives her peace.

  • Christopher Prince Boucher

    I would not promote violence, but great article!

  • dorothy

    Ugh, the comment “…and they are much prettier” is plain creepy and way out of line.
    Come on Bud, stop it already.

    Thanks Angela for setting things straight.

  • Kristianna

    Angela,

    I commend you on your well-spoken and clearly articulated response to Bud.

    Here’s to when society is no longer so afraid of child r*pe, that everyone begins to step forward and work towards keeping our children safe, respected and in an environment in which they can not only survive, but thrive.

    Along and active in the battle,
    K

  • http://www.rewovenlife.blogspot.com Susan Kaufman

    OMG!!! I want in on the bitch-slapping!
    Angela, I commend you for a ‘calm’ response. I’m just furious with this idiot.
    And on a side note, I love what you’re putting on your t-shirts!!!

  • Lana M. Anderson

    i concur with your rebuttal. good job…

  • http://www.beyondthetears.com Lynn Tolson

    You have way more energy than me to reply to that idiot Bud. Besides, Larry King is an idiot for asking the question “did you enjoy it” and I wanted to bitch slap LK for that. When I blogged on LK, someone said, hey Lynn don’t bother, you can’t educate morons. Angela, you did a great job here. Thank you.

  • http://www.AngelFury.org Claudine Dombrowski

    You go Angela!!! and PS put my order in for your t-shirts ..
    -Stop Raping Your Children, Go F*@*$ Yourself-
    luv ya!!

  • http://angelashelton.com/ Angela Shelton

    Amen Anne. If it weren’t for strong women like yourself we wouldn’t have the training from Darkness to Light that can educate the ignorant. Bud sure got smacked a few times today but I’d rather Bud get scolded than yet another child be raped because people simply “can’t believe it”

    And I’m excited to give Mackenzie the Voice of Courage Award too!!! Did you send out a release about that?

    And PS, my t-shirts are going to say Stop Raping Your Children, Go F*@*$ Yourself. :)

  • Dee

    AMEN!!

  • http://d2l.org anne lee

    You go sista! Bitch slappin angels unite! But you are so right about bud having the courage to start a dialog, thank you bud. And we do need to get all responsible adults to get trained how to prevent (!) Recognize and react responsibly to sexual abuse. It doesn’t have to happen. We can stop it in real time. But we have to turn our bitch slapping energy into proactive community prevention initiatives. Do come to http://www.d2l.org and let”s get strated! (I think we should have t-shirts made that say:” bss-bitch slapping sistas! Dedicated to keeping kids safe. ” ) What do you think??? Anne. Ps. We are thrilled and honored to give mckenzie our voice of courage award at the cnn circle of light gala, nov 19th in charleston,sc. Ya’ll come!

  • http://angelashelton.com/ Angela Shelton

    Thanks ladies. I had to pipe up on that one.

  • http://hereandnow4angel.blogspot.com Angela

    Let the bitch slapping begin!!!

  • Erica

    Very nicely said Angela! Bud, look into becoming more educated about child sexual abuse and rape please. Angela did a very good job explaining this to you, but I am right there with her about bitch slapping you.

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