Woooweeee, some loaded questions today! I love that you ask me these awesome questions! I’ll switch things up today and answer one at a time.
Can u write about what happens when you hit a wall and your sex life is non-existent, after having abuse, trauma, and violence?
First I’d suggest reading the post I wrote about Having Health Sex after Horrible Experience. But you did that! So what about a non-existent sex life? I’d suggest that first thing – don’t judge yourself about it or beat yourself up either. There are always phases and cycles in life and the bed rocking can be as up and down as our many emotions. It’s totally okay. And honestly, sometimes it’s great to take a break and focus on yourself anyway.
When you shift your focus away from the bedroom and more on the connection between you, your Higher Power and your partner, the bed rocking shows up naturally anyway. If you’re not in a relationship, I’d say stop begging life for one and focus on your connection to life itself. Mates usually show up at the same level we are at so if you’re in a bad sad place, you don’t want to attract someone also in a bad sad place or worse, one who preys on sad.
If you are in a relationship, stop putting all the focus on the bedroom. If you keep saying there’s an issue, all you do is create one. Go back to dating. Go back to kissing on the porch before you open the front door. Put a romantic card on their desk or in their bag about how much you love them. If you switch your focus from a needy freaked out place where “omg we have issues” to “I adore you and remember why I’m with you in the first place” the romance wave will roll in again.
On the flip side, if you’re in a horrible relationship and your body is in shut down mode telling you to exit stage left – that’s another story. All I can assure you of is that you already know the answer to your question. Just listen to yourself.
I want to hear about your personal faith and how your view on God has changed since you were young.
Awesome question. I’m honored you asked it. Actually, my personal faith as gone back to where it was when I was young. I was a bit of a deviant child. I know you’re shocked! I was the one who stood up on the church pew with my hands on my hips and said Nuh-huh to the dogma the preacher was spewing. Of course I got a supreme ass whipping for that, but I have not lost that rebel streek. In fact I have more of one now.
As a young child I was convinced we all had a connection to God. My mother taught me at a very young age to meditate so by age 7 I was already sitting in silence and clearing my mind as much as I could in the mornings and evenings. I learned to listen and focus on the bigger picture. And I believed and experienced many times that there is a bigger force around us. We’re not just flying around Earth on a mission-less roller coaster of nothing.
We have guides, helpers, angels and – connection to IT. If you tap into it, listen and start communicating, the life journey gets a whole lot more interesting and fun. And when you have friends who can actually see dead people and talk to the “other side” it becomes extra interesting!
As I grew up and got a bit more jaded (shocked?), the rebel in me questioned everything and rolled my eyes about everything much like I did at the preacher when I was young. I wanted to know more. I wanted a reason to believe. I didn’t see a reason why I shouldn’t just go about my days with a big fat Whatever! I wanted proof. Then I got it. Many times. And I still wanted proof. I’m so stubborn! Maybe one day I’ll write a book about all of those experiences that proved IT to me. (I did put A LOT of my experiences into my first memoir – Finding Angela Shelton.)
Now, after many personal experiences that confirmed for me what I suspected when I was young, I realize that I can simply talk to the other side, as plainly as I talk to a friend. It’s a fun kind of prayer and it works for me all the time. I knew it when I was young. I just knew it. But I went through a long time of questioning everything. Now I don’t anymore.
Of course non-believers will poo poo that but I don’t really care since they are on their own journey. Which brings me to your next question.
What do you think about people who want to preach the Bible, but don’t appear to live by it themselves?
I don’t think much about it because that’s their problem. Not mine or yours. I don’t think all the answers are in any book anyway – you already know the answers to the questions if you listen. Woooweee – some hardnutjobs will shoot you for saying that! Those are the ones really not living the love. They amuse me and make me shake my head in wonder.
People like to hold onto anchors in life whether it’s a belief, a cause or an opinion and many of them will clutch to that until their dying day. Sadly, those who “preach” that they know the answers tend to be so whacky and the opposite of any Christian teaching I’ve ever read (from Jesus that is). When from what I’ve experienced, if the diehards holding onto what they’ve been taught instead of what they experiences for themselves would listen to their connections – really – we might witness someone dropping their picket sign and running to a dance class or picking up a flute and being able to magically play a tune!
I don’t know, there are people preaching and not living it in all religions, aren’t there? There are people who stand at the pulpit spitting “the truth” at you and ordering you to do something – or else! And then there are those who simply believe and live their lives as their teaching and teach by example. I try to be one of those people and not pay much attention to the whackos. Although sometimes I can’t help myself and have to say Nuh-huh…